Memory Lane…. A few years back, a friend and I have had this talk about death. Yeah! we talk of death as naturally as living the life you’ve lead, as naturally as breathing the air around you, as naturally as loving the person beside you. We discovered that both of us were thinking of the same thing, that is, if we only have the power to schedule our entrance to the pearly gate, it would happen at half-centenarian, the very ripe age of 50.
Then something happened and I was in a state of depression and then, I had my fourth surgery. Before that I had been telling myself, “Oh! I am just so, so tired of another surgery.” As I’ve said, it’s my fourth.
So I entered the operating room, state of the mind: I am ready to die.
WOW! this would be perfect timing anyway I’m already approaching 50. Wish granted! Perhaps at this point, I am just too excited to be HOME at last, to face my creator. Or perhaps I wanted to end the pain, both emotional and physical. I realized that when you are sick and depressed, you are vulnerable to all kinds of hurts. Secretly, I have been praying, “God, please take me now…. NOW NA!”
But Alas! God had other plans for things did not turn out the way I wanted it to. He gave me a new life, a new beginning. And I say now, “Today is the best day of the rest of my life. I won’t ruin it with the worries of yesterday and the fears of tomorrow.”
I believe He gave me each morning, each day, each moment not because I needed it but because others need me. Each morning is a reason to hope, trust and act, to believe that when all else fails, God is always there.
What I prayed before about God taking me now, let’s just blame it on the hormones… sometimes they play havoc and speaks through your emotions.
Now I’m back and I thank you God for every morning that breaks into my life.
Each day is a special gift from God, and while life may not always be fair, you must never allow the pains, hurdles, and handicaps of the moment to poison your attitude and plans for yourself and your future. You can never win when you wear the ugly cloak of self-pity, and the sour sound of whining will certainly frighten away any opportunity for success. Never again. There is a better way. – Og Mandino