The single woman is home to a whirlwind of contradictions and catastrophic emotions. One moment she falls head over heels for a guy, the next she hates him like hell; another moment she feels like she’s amongst the rich and the famous, the next she is a pauper looking for her brother prince; yet another moment she is euphoric over something, the next she just feel lonely and sad over nothing. One moment 24 hours is not enough for the mountainous task ahead, the next 24 hours seems like eternity waiting like a bum. This happens every now and then; and to the best and most of us.
The single woman learns to be strong by and in herself since she has no valiant knight in shining armor to scare all the bad guys away. She has no protective shoulder to cry on when she feels like bursting into gallons of tears because of insurmountable fears. She has to be a man in herself playing like a Jack of all and old trades to survive the battles of life. She has to be that Do-It-Yourself thing to repair and fix leaking faucets and pipes, damaged roof and gutters and erring electrical connections, etc., etc.
She parties all night and have fun with her girlFRIENDS, or boyFRIENDS, or gayFRIENDS, or watch movies and the never ending stories of the soap operas and then quarry on an expedition to Never-Never-land to look for some adventures in a series of misadventures. She squarely faces with all courage and might the patronizing looks at family gatherings and high school reunions when they learn that she’s not dating anyone and pat her on the back and say: “Oh, don’t worry. You’re surely next!” or “Don’t be so choosy, he might just be the man on the next block.”
She loses jobs and friends and parents and lovers… and sometimes has no one but her pillow to witness her tears.
She falls in love – deeply, madly, passionately in love – even if sometimes, the object of her love forgets to love her back. Sometimes she loves someone for years, (perhaps in her lifetime) without the other person even knowing she existed. She suffers in unfathomable silence, hoping that one day he’ll not just look at her, but really SEE her as herself; that he’ll not just want her, but NEED her as well.
Sometimes life offers her a second chance to get it right… other times just a second chance to say goodbye. Because sometimes, even after all the hurt, and all the waiting, and all the hoping, and all the wishing… it still doesn’t work out. Sometimes she just realizes that the only way to be true to HIM and to HERSELF is to let him go.
If she’s lucky, she may have a best friend to show her the strength when she seemed lost in her ways. Or other friends to inspire her to be a better version of herself, to encourage her to never lose faith and that hope is not lost, and believe that someday her Prince Charming will appear on her balcony and kiss and wake her up from the deepest slumber of despair.
Though the journey of a single woman is not an easy one, here are some good news. She welcomes the dangers of the unknown. She embraces the freedom and she needs no permission from anyone to do so. There is a fire in her soul that can never quite be tamed…an unwillingness to settle…an independence all her own, built from the knowledge that she can do absolutely anything without calling for backup and prides herself in knowing that she is damn good doing it. There is a wisdom she possesses that comes from surviving many a broken heart. She can enter a room grandly, accompanied by no one but me, myself and I…and a confidence that comes from knowing she is not afraid to fall…because each time she falls, life presents her with another opportunity to get up and move on. She realizes a happy life is more important than a happy ending…and that she does not need a significant other to lead a significant life.
And if one day, her Prince does find her, she does not expect him to complete her, but to compliment her.
Note: This post was inspired by another post by a tweeter friend. To read the post, click here.